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Civil Conversations

Having a civil conversation goes beyond mere talking to another, but to walk with someone even if one disagrees on everything.

Recently I was listening to a program on NPR (National Public Radio).  The program was from "On Being" which it describes itself this way:

"On Being is a spacious conversation — and an evolving media space — about the big questions at the center of human life, from the boldest new science of the human brain to the most ancient traditions of the human spirit."

The particular program I was listening to, is part of their Civil Conversations Project.

"The Civil Conversations Project (CCP) — ideas and tools for healing our fractured civic spaces.  CCP is a series of radio shows and an online resource for beginning new conversations in families and communities. How do we speak the questions we don't know how to ask each other? Can we find ways to bridge gulfs between us about politics, morality, and life itself? Can we do that even while we continue to disagree, passionately? How is technology playing into all this, and how can we shape it?"

You can find it here: http://being.publicradio.org/first-person/civil-conversations/

Indeed, civil conversation is what is needed in these polarized times.  It is so easy to demonize someone we disagree with politically, theologically, or socially.

As I began to work in the Episcopal Diocese of Connecticut in 1998, I met weekly with a group of other new priests.  One of the new priests was a retired military officer who had a call to the ordained ministry later in life.  I was fresh out of seminary and only 5 years after my college days at the University of Michigan.  He was very conservative and I was not.  Despite the differences, we had a friendship that grew over the year.  We learned about each others families, our differences and how God had called each of us to the ministry.

In 2003, the Rev. Gene Robinson was elected bishop of New Hampshire.  Gene was in a committed relationship with his partner Mark.  This led some in the Episcopal Church to leave to find a new faith home.  My friend and his congregation left the Episcopal Church.  I still remember all those times we sat in the same room, shared a meal, had a conversation but never ever cast the other out.  I was sad to see him leave but honor his need to find the right path.

It will take effort in our conversations in Monroe to not disparage others.  It will not mean we will come to an agreement but that we can stay talking without the need to cast out the other. 

If we expect to walk together as fellow travelers on this planet, we need to take the time to learn about each other, to talk with each other, even to share a meal.  When we do this, we will not be able to condemn the other, for the other will now be our friend.

Postscript: Sometime in the winter, I will offer a class one evening at the Library to begin our civil conversations based on the work of that radio show.  Stay tuned.

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Just a short thought to get the word out quickly about anything in your neighborhood.
Share something with your neighbors. Write a new post... What's up? Make an announcement, speak your mind, or sell something
Brooke Burling May 24, 2013 at 08:33 am
Only one week to go until auditions (Friday, May 31), so interested actors sign up now!
Laura Tulley May 23, 2013 at 12:23 pm
Thank you everyone for your comments. Carl - will try not to be offended by your "anyone withRead More half a brain" comment. I am dismayed to hear Dawn that you have made this effort and been turned down by the town and police department (it's not uncommon for me to see the police speeding up and down Moose Hill Road too!) Glad to hear, though, that I am not alone in seeing a need for people to get a grip on the road. Slow down. Hang up. Comply with stop signs and stop lights. Be courteous.
Laura May 23, 2013 at 11:17 am
I have been tail-gated so many times - everywhere in Monroe - I drive a little over the posted speedRead More limit BUT I respect the people walking (most of the time in the wrong direction) and bike riders (they too ride in the wrong direction. HANG UP THE PHONE - DON'T PIGGY BACK thru a stop sign, and learn the right of way rule. AND STOP SIGNS mean S T O P!!! Robin lane people are good for running stop signs. And Pepper Street is 25 mph - NOT 45 or 50!!! Walkers & runners FACE TRAFFIC - Bike riders RIDE WITH TRAFFIC. AND one more thing - don't block the drive ways if there is a stop light - and someone coming in or out - let them and move on. THANKS for letting me get this off my chest!!!!!
Dawn May 22, 2013 at 10:28 am
Good luck Laura, My husband and I tried to get some on Purdy Hill Road from Rt.111 to Rt.25. theyRead More said they can't do it. I have asked numerous times to have a police officer sit in Farmview or use our driveway, said it's too dangerous, go figure. Tired of drivers around town having no respect for other drivers and people walking on side of road. It gets to the point that I don't even want to leave my house. Get a clue people slow down, stay off phones, it's not hard.
Pictured from left: Rev. John Hanwell, S.J., President; Dr. Robert Perrotta, Principal, Mark Giannini; John Hanrahan, Dean of Guidance & College Advising; and Jon DeRosa, Director of Student Activities & Christian Service.
Nancy B. May 22, 2013 at 03:08 pm
Congratualtions to Mark and his family!!!!! Well done Mark.....your future is bright!